janini’s lair

suxal suxal ng buhay ko kanina…depression galore in the morning! nyahahaha… at xempwe as always, samu’t sari ang mga dahilan….

1. masaya ang buhay mula pa kahapon, haayyy…and it could all revert back to milenyo–my favorite storm of the year. aun, kahapon e bumalik ako for qnair collection fero dahil madaming pasaway sa mundo anadamee kong kulang. as een. gwabe talaga. hainaqu. sana tubuan ng kulugo sa armpit ung mahigit 70 na hindi nagbalik. cnayang nila ang pagod at pera ko. nihao! dahil ke milenyo e napurnada ang aking 1st collexon, ewan ko na kung anung mangyayari sa buhay tisis ko neto. xetty.

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2. kahapon din ay naghanap ako ng mga experts dahil required ako ng aking beloved thesis adviser. aun I thought everything will be okay pero ung 1 may sakit, ung isa naman e nasa Bangkok, Thailand. Napaka "warm" ng mga taong tanungan sa UPD. Gwabe, papagawan ko sila ng monumento…monumento ng kamalditahan! AGrK!!!

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3. So bottom line, nag-axaya ako ng time, muni and enerjee kahapon. hainaqu ulet!

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aun, tudei naman e dapat me clas ako ng 7am, nag-alarm ako ng fon, aun nagtaka lang ako ng mabanaag ko ang sunny sunshine ng umaga…xitty, it was already 6am! garkhg!

at dahil namu2roblema ako sa thesis na purnada at dapt pasahan ng proposal, at gayundin sa subject kokanina, natraian ko c nanay,,,aun,,,away galore. pero sya lang nang-aaway.la akong panahon mang-away kanina..nagwowori pa ako sa 1 celfone na angluluko at may mga confidential materials pero pag nalamn ng aking ama na naccra na e ako ang mapuputukan.wahaw.

at dahil umagang-umaga e para akong iwinawasiwas sa apoy ng karimlan, aun.humiga na lang ako, nag-wallo sa feelings at nakinig ng classical music.yeBAH!

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Mga lagpas 1 hr din akong ganun, tas nagtext ang mga butihin kong blockmates, di pala pumasok c pwof (hihi), tas pagbaba ko nag-cool down na c madir, pero xempwe wula pa din akong thesis at sira pa din c fone. hay.

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eto ngayun, blog2 muna bago magpanggap na gumagawa ng cram-of-the-century masterpiece.hekhek…hoping that at the end of the day the liquor will wash ol my woes away. hekhek… in feirness alam ng mga magulang na ang aking patutunguhan mamaya paglatag ng kadiliman.hahaha

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Catharsis Galore:

Hindi ko alam kung anu sumapi sa aking kagabi at naisipan akong lumayo…lumayo mula sa pasakit.wula namang nagtrigger.napagod na alang talaga cguro ako dahil sa madaming contradictories. conflicts. echus. wula nmang "iba"…I’m just sick and tired of the very idea na ganito na lang lagi…gipit at dapat mag-adjust lague… Im just experiencing the tension of opposites (as Morrie coined it) wherein I realized that the very things I thought I will experience when I enter something like this e hindi ko naman nararanasan…plus the very idea na ako lang talaga ang nag-aadjust at nag-lelevel off is sickening…I maybe hard to please, very demanding and high-financed but all of those things reside in oblivion…I was able to strip them away to stay…Y can’t you do the same???

You claim that you only change and adjust if you believe in the essence of doing so, but hey, I was able to change and adjusteven without thinkingif I believe in it…just to compromise..just to stay…

In any case…if I force myself to believe that this is a fleeting experience, then everything will be tolerable…

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There are days so dark, not even the brightest of sunshine could light it up…every light just seems to be absorbed by the eternal nothingness…

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 5th, 2006 at 11:34 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.