harder and harder to breathe
Im not gonna cry today because I have everything in the world today that tells me its irrational to do so. Im not gona be upset because being happy and lavishing what I have right now is sooo much better than sulk in my old self. If I cannot change your opinion of me, Im not gonna waste another second in trying to fit in what you want for me. Making people happy is indeed a very difficult task. But I guess that once I find my own happiness it will shine through me and influence the others.
___________________________________________________________________________
I am not in love in its pure, unobliterated state but sure I think I can call myself happy. _________________________________________________________________________
I am doing everything in my powers today to make amend with you but it just seem that the more I step closer the more you lean away. It hurts me so to see us like this, but it hurts me more to learn from you that those years we spent together was indeed more of like an illusion. I led myself to believe that we unveiled almost everything to each other completely but it turns out that I was the only one doing that and believing that.
__________________________________________________________________________
I believe that everbody deserves to be happy in one way or another and indeed we all should strive for that. Im tired of worrying about the future…I am so darn tired of thinking about what people will say… I just want to cherish what I have today even if the future is a blur.
___________________________________________________________________________
Sure, I might suffer…but I just don’t have the patience to worry about it now.
____________________________________________________________________________
Self-absorption and insensitivity is a deadly duo and slowly its killing me as it shines to me from you. What we have is something so important Im willing to compromise and prioritize it over other things but it just seems to me that your not willing to do the same. Yes, it pains me, but it will hurt me more to dwell in this situation where areas you don’t appear to have the slightest interest in solving it.
__________________________________________________________________________
In this cloistered cell…
I am trapped within myself…in this cloistered cell I constructed my solitary confinement into an agonizing abyss. I was famished for warmth and care that I hungrily took the very first hand who fed me with an abundance of such.
Over and over again the hand was warned of the uncertainty of the situation but the hand seems unmindful of the seeping truth. The hand was blinded by its selflessness that it failed to see that it was in fact feeding a demon in the making.
How this will end is another turn in the labyrinth. (Will the creature decide to be a complete demon or will the hand’s selflessness be enough for its redemption?)
_____________________________________________________________________________________
I hope that is just a test we have to surpass…you are so important to me and I hope that you know it..
